Sunday, December 31, 2023

PhIndia!

 When Phin was one year old, my dad—his birthday twin grandfather—advised us to all get passports. 

He was 76 years old then and wanted to make a family trip back to his home country of India so that his grandkids could meet relatives and see his homeland. When Phin was two, the pandemic struck, grounding us all. A few months after Phin’s third birthday, just as pandemic restrictions were beginning to lift, my dad’s back started to hurt. Four months later, he was diagnosed with multiple myeloma—a cancer that had been steadily eating away at the vertebrae in his spine, causing pain so severe that it eventually became the symptom that spawned his diagnosis. 

By the time Phin was four years old, my dad’s cancer was under control and in remission, but he was still battered. Then, three months before his birthday, Phin began treatment for his own cancer—a diagnosis, which you know—rocked our family to the absolute core. Phin rang the bell at age five.

This past summer, Phin turned six. Phin is still in remission. My dad is still in remission. In August, two months after Phin’s sixth birthday, my dad presented his four children once again with the prospect of fulfilling his dream to visit India with his children and grandchildren “one last time.” His resolve had grown since we first got passports for the kids five years ago. The years had been racked with the loss of my dad’s relatives back home in India and his brother in Canada. While he and Phin had overcome their individual cancers, my dad had lost his brother-in-law in India and his dearest younger brother during the pandemic. He had lost much of his own energy and strength battling cancer. Now, with the blessing of his oncologist and the green light from Phin’s, my dad, at the ripe age of 81 years old, was finally ready and able to fulfill his dream of returning to India with his family and introducing his grandchildren to the land of his youth.

Phin and Pepop in India

In September, we scrambled to get the kids new passports—it had been just over five years since we started this journey to fulfill my dad’s dream. Just long enough for their passports to expire. So they all got new ones. They got visas and learned how to pack and keep track of their carry-ons. They all learned how to swallow pills in order to take their anti-malaria medicine—a trick we'd assumed would've been no problem for Phin, given the number of much more difficult and painful medical chores he's already had to perform (hard at first, then he got it, and now it's easy). And in mid-December, we were off!

Phin and cousins (from L to R: ages 7, 6, and 5) navigate the airport rush

From trying all kinds of Indian dishes to zooming through narrow streets in tuk-tuks to touring ancient Buddhist caves and running from snack-grabbing monkeys, Phin and Pepop did it all. They hung out with “ancestors” (aka relatives) in Mumbai. They went to Agra and saw the Taj Mahal. They went to Jaipur and to Delhi. One thing to know about Phin is this: he will find a way to play and a person to play with no matter where he is or what language barrier might stand in his way. In true Phin fashion, he played his way through India, as evidenced in the photos below of him with various friends he made in his travels.



If you ask Phin what he loved most about his trip, he might say one of a few things: tiny hot cups of chai everywhere we went, pani puri, rich real-chocolate-made hot chocolates, or the cows, monkeys, rats, and goats (wearing sweaters) roaming freely in the streets. He will tell you we stayed in five hotels, saw just as many cities, ate in "a lot of restaurants", spent many hours on buses (taking photos of the free range animals for Phin—note: this was a device-free trip save for the use of phones as cameras throughout: definitely the right decision) and airplanes, and met some of his ancestors. He liked the Lake Palace Hotel, playing tag at the art museum in Mumbai, and scoring his siblings and cousins sweets from the guard at Mahatma Gandhi's memorial: Raj Ghat (pictured above). He will tell you about "Indian toilets" and how loud the outside world in India is—full of beeping horns and speeding tuk-tuks. Phin kept a daily journal full of insightful gems of observation that only he could have—a genuine treasure trove of moments he (and we) will forever cherish. Topping the list of it all, though, Phin would tell you the best part of the whole trip was "being with my family."

Phin with sisters and cousins at the Taj Mahal, Agra, India.

Phin and Caroline blending in Delhi where the smog is so thick we had to wear masks

It was the trip of a lifetime, thanks entirely to my dad, his generosity, and his will to make this trip come to fruition. A long-delayed dream fulfilled at last. 

Medical Updates

Nothing to see here. Phin doesn't return for a clinic checkup until February 2024, so we've still got a little while to wait. In the absence of blood counts from labwork, all we've got are the much less scientific indicators of "Does his skin look like it still has color in it?" (yes, more or less?) and "Is his energy level still pretty high?" (always, even in the darkest of times) and "Does he bleed out if he scrapes up his knee?" (no) and "Is his appetite good?" (meh). We think he's probably still good.

Oh! Fun fact that Dustin discovered while Googling the drug atovaquone, which is part of the combination of drugs (along with proguanil) that was prescribed for us to take to prevent malaria, is that atovaquone is also being studied for possible benefits in AML treatment. Cool!

UPDATE: Phin’s top front right tooth is loose! I’m not sure if we’ve mentioned this tooth phenomenon yet so here it goes. To date, Phin has lost two bottom teeth; when I say “lost”, I literally mean we’ve never seen them once they’ve fallen out of their rightful places in his mouth. One minute they were loose and still in there, the next he came running excitedly to tell us he’d lost a tooth! Like, actually lost the tooth and didn’t know where it was but would the tooth fairy come anyway?!? 

Now we are on “loose tooth watch” and hoping to not let this next one get away like the others before it. 

Phin On the Daily
Phin's big family trip to India was the gem in December's crown—the whole year, for that matter! But he also got to do some other awesome things this month, like hang out with his buddies Miles, Carson, and Aspen at one of our favorite events of the year—the CURE holiday party, followed closely by another newly favorite event of the year—the LLS holiday party for visionaries where he got to hang out with Aspen again. He rounded out the month celebrating Christmas at home with his sisters! 






Phevers

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